She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
