I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
What a dumb baby whore.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
