so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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