dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
