He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Randomize
