Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize