dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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