Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
