i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Dick very happy bro
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
