Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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