Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize
