Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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