if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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