Your tits are I can't wait for
Its about making memories worth repressing
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
