She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
