"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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