I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
