Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
