that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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