it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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