he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
