Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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