Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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