Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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