He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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