We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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