i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Randomize
