What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
he puts the penis in happiness.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
