What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
