i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize