using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
