You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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