what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Randomize
