i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
