3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
