Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
please don't ironically join a cult
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