Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
