How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
