and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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