I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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