the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
