We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I will be naked everywhere
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
