she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
When did angry sex become our thing?
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
