she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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