if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Mom said you looked used
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
