They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
