Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
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