it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Couch. On fire.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
