windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
