Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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